Why cancer counselling is not having a cancer buddy.

When you have a cancer diagnosis, and become a patient, it can throw a whole new dimension on what you thought you knew about cancer.

You’re unique and your cancer treatment and survival pathway will be unique.

You may want to talk to someone who has “been through it” for support, advice and with pre-existing knowledge - sharing information the oncologists don’t give you.  That person might become your cancer buddy.  Great relationships and support form between people who understand and “get it”.

Talking to other cancer patients, means you will have to do some listening yourself and offer support.  Are you strong enough and equipped to do that?  What if things don’t go well for your buddy and you become emotionally close?

SO WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE WITH PROFESSIONAL COUNSELLING?

I am a counsellor, a trained listener who has worked in cancer care and also been a patient.  I get it.  However, I am there to listen to you.  You are not there to listen to my experience and my emotions.  You are unique and you need to explore the meaning of your diagnosis, treatment and after effects; the impact on your well-being, your loved ones, your working life and plans you made.

I will be able to deeply connect with the experience of hearing those words “you have cancer”.  I understand what treatments are like but I want to hear about yours.

Let me say again, the counselling relationship is there to focus solely on you.

Counselling provides confidential time, one to one, for you to explore your experience; it might be feelings of anger, loss, pain, stress and fear.  You don’t need to protect me by what you say.  

You attend counselling sessions to find your meaning and to work out how it has impacted you and why you might be feeling distress even though the medical appointments are over.  Fear of recurrence is real and ever present.

I am your cancer support, here for you, there is no need to show up and use your energy supporting someone else.  I want to hear about your cancer journey and the impact and during counselling we will work together to find psychological relief for you.  Oncologists and surgeons are absolutely brilliant but your emotional health can get lost .

PS - If you do find a cancer buddy, enjoy the new relationship - you have a lot to offer each other and may form an amazing friendship.

For one to one personal cancer counselling, email me amanda@human2human.co.uk or text 07852 899617